It’s 7:30 am now. I have been up since about 6:20 am. That means I had a great night sleep. The doctor put me on a new medication and I always forget it doesn’t work overnight and I get frustrated and start stinking thinking that the medicine is not working and making me sick and that I am not bipolar.
I know I tend to say a mouthful sometimes. I guess I just get carried away. We all do about things we are passionate about.
The new meds have me going to sleep literally 5 minutes after i take it. It dissolves under my tongue and out to sleep land. No more getting up at 3:30 am or staying up till 3:30 am and getting 3 hours sleep. The paranoia is gone and I am functioning quite well. I think the old school term would have been mainstream. I am in the middle lane doing just fine.
I look at the sunrise or sunset photo on this page and think, “how awesome”. The dawn of a new day or the end of a day that I am still here. Still alive, despite whatever bipolar episode I may have experienced. And if I am stable, like now, I am really ecstatic.
I must never lose sight, that a storm could happen at any time, but more importantly I will come through it.
The last few months have been really hard with mixed episodes. Even so, I have accomplished some of my goals. That lets me know, the toolkit is working and the project board is working for me.
Find what works for you and then you can Purpose To Have an Awesome Day. My day is awesome by my standard which is that I accomplished one thing I wanted to. Even if it took me all day. For me, that is an awesome day.
Getting out of the house and smiling at the sun or spinning in the rain, is an awesome day, because I did something.
Find out what is an awesome day for you. It changes day to day, but it is a great feeling. It means you are working towards getting well and reaching your goals in spite of the unpredictable storm.
Love to you all
pb aka peanut butter