I have had cancer twice, almost died twice from high blood pressure at age 15, was addicted to drugs and was an alcoholic.
For 23 years I was abused by my ex-husband in ways that I could not say out loud in divorce court so I walked away with only my life and a few pennies he was forced to give me so that I would sign the house deed over to him.
Once I was diagnosed with bipolar, I did not divulge that I was still doing drugs. I kept doing drugs while taking the medication for bipolar.
After feeling like I was having a heart attack for the third time, I decided that I was not leaving this world due to drug use. My alcohol use had already stopped. I prayed at that moment for God to deliver me from drugs and I have not touched them since that night. The funny thing is that I was living with someone who was lighting up at that very moment. Even though I kept living with that person for a while after I stopped, it never bothered me. I never craved drugs again.
Now my biggest challenge is living with bipolar, anxiety and an array of other health problems.
Life is good and I am healing more and more from my past everyday. Healing is a process and my goal is to help others who are victims of domestic violence, drug users, alcoholics and those who live and struggle with mental illness everyday. Helping others is part of my healing journey and that is what makes it a process.
Today, driving to my place of refuge, the rain was coming down and I asked God to keep the sun shining inside of me even though it was raining on the outside and that He would use me to bring a smile or a laugh to someone today: this is my medicine.
Have you started your healing process?
love to all,
pb aka peanut butter