Even Keel Feels Good

My therapist told me I had to start blogging again.

Once again, I told her I had nothing to blog about and that I could only write when I was depressed.   It seemed to be the only time I had something within me to share with others.

Someone else told me, my blog seemed sad.

So this is what I have to share today:

Somehow a friend and I got on the discussion of depression as an illness.

I said what I had to say ( I don’t remember what it was, it’s not important) their answer is the key.

They said, I know what you mean.  I get depressed and then I start to encourage myself.  I look

at all that I have and what others do not have and I begin to feel better and I am not depressed anymore.

Despite the fact I told them the symptoms of  depression when diagnosed as a mental illness they still did

not see the difference.  They could not understand that when you are mentally ill and depressed

you cannot just encourage yourself out of depression or just look at what others do not have and what

you do and feel better.  It does not work that way.

Another time, I was beginning to feel depressed.  My stomach had that agonizing pain, I was crying and

starting to sink into despair.  I called my safe person to come and pick me up.  They said they would but that

I had to keep it together.

Keep it together.  I thought.  If I could keep it together I would not have made the call.

People say things like this because they truly don’t understand or they don’t take the time to think.

I felt that statement was hurtful because this was my safe go to person that I could go to instead of

the hospital.  Now I had no one.

I did not want to go to their place.  I felt it was no longer a warm safe haven where I wanted to be.

I scrolled down my contact list to find anyone I could say was coming over to keep me safe by spending

the day with me.  The first name was that of a friend I had not in touch with for months.  Would they come?

I called them and they came in the middle of their work day to check on me.  They have been a safe go to

person for me ever since and a tremendous blessing. This is when I was at a point of giving up.  Hope was already

gone and the Why bother question was creeping in.

She helped me get back on my feet and get things turned around, now I am back to even keel and it feels good.

It is great to have someone who really understands what it is all about and knows just what to say.  Having

someone to help you pull your mind together and then your physical together is a great thing.  They are my new safe go to

person.

Life changes and so do people in our support system for reasons we do not always know.  Sometimes they change

at the most inopportune time,  Now, I realize I should have had more than one go to safe person.

Don’t make the same mistake I did.  You want to get back to even keel as soon as possible.  Sometimes

having that go to safe person is the only way to get back there.

love to all,

pb aka peanut butter

persistently pursuing a way to encourage others and to let them know they are not alone in this battle of

living to be mentally healthy

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Author: Fighter

I finally accepted what people have been telling me. I am full of knowledge and wisdom and I am unforgettable. My word of encouragement since 2015 has been to let others know, despite the waves and ripples in our lives, Life is totally awesome, even with a mental illness. I believe my purpose is to encourage others, advocate for those around me who have not yet found their voice to advocate for themselves and educate those without a mental illness. If for one for minute someone laughs or smiles because of something I said, that is one moment they did not think about mental illness.

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