stop the crying

I am so sensitive I cannot distinguish between me and the bipolar.  Lately, everyday I break down and cry.  Sometimes, it seems that I even forget to breathe.  What is going on with me?

I am wondering if I need a medication adjustment or am I having mixed episodes from day to day.

I realize people treat you the way they observe you treating yourself. Sometimes I do not think highly of myself and this comes through.  I say negative things and it comes across as being weak minded.  One person called this bipolar drama.  I assured him that having a mental illness is sh**** but think about how the person feels who lives with it everyday.  We cannot help that our brain is sick.

I know this, but it seems as though I am having a hard time changing how I respond to things.  Too sensitive I know, however I have been like this all life.  How do I change?

One person said it is high school sh** and that I need to be like Teflon  I believe that if I were Teflon it would almost dehumanize me.

How do I find the balance in between way too sensitive (usually between depression and mania) and being Teflon?

 

 

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Author: Fighter

I finally accepted what people have been telling me. I am full of knowledge and wisdom and I am unforgettable. My word of encouragement since 2015 has been to let others know, despite the waves and ripples in our lives, Life is totally awesome, even with a mental illness. I believe my purpose is to encourage others, advocate for those around me who have not yet found their voice to advocate for themselves and educate those without a mental illness. If for one for minute someone laughs or smiles because of something I said, that is one moment they did not think about mental illness.

2 thoughts on “stop the crying”

    1. Lately I started feeling like not only do I have to hide my tears but I question if I even have bipolar or as 2 men in my life have said “You are just feeling sorry for yourself” I am tempted to stop my medication when I hear that. It is usually during a time when stinking thinking is front and center. When I do not cry, I self harm. Thank you for sharing

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